I take care of a 5-year-old. It’s my job. I also take care of a three-year-old. This is, you know, part of my job. The girls are professionals at throwing tantrums. My tantrum philosophy is Ignore It. When you Ignore It, you are telling the child that they can’t use that means of communication. I’ve […]
Every woman should marry a writer. The benefits are numerous.
Dear Volkswagen driver, Don’t you think it’s kind of hilarious to put a “The ice caps are melting” bumper sticker on your car? I do.
I get really nervous in womanly places. Not the woman aisle in the store, or among a group of women I know. Instead, I get nervous heading into salons. I feel uneasy in places that require femininity. Oh, I know femininity has nothing to do with clothes and hair and we’re all very much evolved […]
Marry the man that, upon hearing you state that you don’t own any bubble bath, suggests “I can run to the store and get you some” at 9pm. Then don’t let go of him.
Eleven years ago I called up a boy and asked him to take a walk with me. I had a serious crush on this boy, and the phone call from my dorm room to his was prefaced by shaking hands and deep breaths. I’m positive he knew what was happening, what this was about, but […]